Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
