omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Randomize
