nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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