I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
