youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
