I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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