i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
nutella sex= disaster
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
