i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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