Got a toothbrush?
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
You're like the curious george of whores
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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