Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
