Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
