Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
