i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
He felt like a one man threesome
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She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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