After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
