My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
