Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
