4 words: hood of his car
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Randomize