we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Randomize
