If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Randomize
