this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Is that strawberry winking at me??
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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