ugly people sure do ruin things
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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