Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
This toilet bowl is my home.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
