i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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