May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Randomize
