Kiss
Puke
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
My vagina just clenched in fear
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
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