Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Randomize
