so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I stole a fireplace last night.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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