did you get engaged???
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
