i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
