dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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