You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize