Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
