he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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