I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize
