what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
