Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Randomize