P.S. I can't hear my feet
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
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