In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
