I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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