Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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