I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
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