i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize