I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
