my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
