Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize