I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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