North Korea, Best Korea!
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
