I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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