Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
