in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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